The Dog that was Difficult to Name


A micro story and illustrations by Ford



When I was a young farm boy, we had a family dog called Mojo, but my pa was real worried we might lose it. So we changed its name to…

Socks (on account it had three white paws and a single black one), but my ma was worried it might end up smelling (as most socks do). So we changed its name to…

Rover, but my nana expressed grave concern that a dog named Rover would simply wander off and never come back. So we changed its name to…

Sean (after the actor Sean Connery), but my gramps (who was reading a lot of Ian Fleming back then) was worried it might end up getting sent to Russia (with love). So we changed its name to…

Lassie-Come-Home, but then my aunt (who was studying law in-between managing the hens) deemed our family might be at risk of getting sued by MGM. So we changed its name to…

However, my eldest sister who was a huge fan of The Artist Formerly Known as Prince wasn’t so crazy about this, and so we changed its name to…  

Rocky, but darn it my eldest brother (who happened to be called Rocky) informed us he hated this dumb decision and threatened to leave the farm. So we changed its name to…

Lucky…

And we stuck with that name.

And you know, for a long while, everything was all fine and dandy down on the farm.

Until that fateful day when Lucky got run over by our combine harvester.

We made a decent grave (for what few parts of Lucky we could find) and my pa fashioned a wooden cross out of old pieces of wood from the barn. The local signwriter did us a great deal of only a dollar a letter for the name ‘Lucky’ to be painted neatly on a plaque, in a font very similar to the sign on Alice Snipers’ diner in town.

“Good thing we decided in the end to call that dog Lucky,” said my pa at the small service we held. “Five bucks for a fancy-lettered name plaque is a smart deal.”

“And to think,” said my ma, “There was our Luke (Luke, that’s me by the way, the youngest of our family, and your humble narrator) aiming all along to call that dog Kiefer Sutherland!”

“Would’ve cost us sixteen bucks for a Kiefer Sutherland plaque,” said my pa. “Bad deal.”    

***

Dear readers, it’s been some years now since we lost Lucky.

Did we get another dog?

Well, nowadays, we stick to those new-fangled AI robot dogs which… true, are expensive to purchase, but at least they don’t come with the emotional strings attached, nor are they a burden to name as they have these real neat factory-designated titles (just like the droids in the Star Wars films) and are impossible to change.     

MU-TT8 is the name of our current model, though (and don’t get telling anyone this) I secretly call it Kiefer Sutherland.


The Dog that was Difficult to Name micro story and illustrations by Ford Waight at The Atomic Mage, 20th June 2021

16 comments

  1. More good words and pictures. Reminds me of how we could never agree on a name for our cats, so most ended up with three or four middle names. The reasoning wasn’t quite the same, though!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I could never name a dog ‘Lucky’ after working at RSA insurance when he was the star of the ads: ‘… that’s More Than Lucky…’ etc. There was even a ‘Lucky Room’ in the Bristol office. When ‘Lucky’ passed away, the staff intranet crashed, such was our sadness (not). Sorry, major digression.

    Great little story, Ford and I love your illustrations! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply to The Atomic Mage Cancel reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s